and i've been there.
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I have found my sense of belonging in myself and what makes my soul and heart smile every day.
I choose to come home to me whenever I feel I get lost in my ride believing we have all the answers to our questions within.
I trust we must create and follow our own path with our heart and soul and not go after the common journey someone has told us to follow.
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How did I get here?
I like to describe my journey as my life traveling. I wasn't always this self-aware, neither I knew that my passion was to connect with other people through meaningful and powerful conversations.
HI, I'M
Maria Paula
It took a lot of effort, self-listening and tears to begin with. Also, many cups of tea and coffee on my old couch to connect to my thoughts, ideas and dreams. Yes! I am both a tea and a coffee person. I Just love them both too much!
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If someone had said to me years ago that coaching would be the type of vocation that would light me up, I would have told them they were nuts. Back at the time, my ideal of happiness and life success was related mostly to a known and prestigious marketing career at a big corporation.
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So, allow me to share my personal story and how am I here today, creating this new path to serve you as an ontological coach.
It all started at MY HOME'S dinner table
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I was born and raised in Colombia; a beautiful and tropical Latin American country, 30 years ago in a medium-size town. I grew up in a loving, happy and caring family who was always my ground and safe space. Food always brought us together as most of the conversations we had -the funniest, more interesting, and most vulnerable ones- happened while we sat together at the dinner table. It was always me, mom, dad and charlie; my brother, who shared this space creating forever memories, and strengthening our close bond.
For us, dinner time was sacred. It was the moment to open up and talk about our days; our happy adventures, our frustrations, and even our dreams. Looking back on this tradition, this was the first time I learned how to communicate and listen openly to others, as well as to talk about myself and my issues seeking any type of support; in this case, my family's. We did that every single day and still do, over the phone. It is still a sacred moment.
Growing up in my family made me who I am today, in a big way. From my loving mom, I learned her openness and sensitiveness towards any situation happening around her, as well as the ability to listen to others with all of our senses. From my one-of-a-kind dad, his love for adventure, his courage to disagree, and how to bring lightness into a difficult life challenge.
Equally important, my too-wise younger brother taught me about discipline and perseverance. He is the type of guy who accomplishes what is set on his mind, -right, Charlie? I am thankful to also share with him and my dad, my love for nature and for outdoor activities. We are all so alike and different at the same time!
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Whether we succeeded or failed, my parents were always there for us. Yes! Even when we failed, because failure is. Part. Of. Our. Lives. And it's ok.
The possibility to make our own mistakes and fail, without being judged or frowned upon is probably one of the most important lessons I have learned from my family. We mostly don't usually get a "one-shot-only", but a "do better next time". It all depends on the lenses we see life through.
It's very powerful to overcome the fear of failure and trust your process. Only then, you will pack your bags and go on a new road...
I changed roads when questions got too loud
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I have packed my bags several times for different reasons. Up until the age of 28 and considering myself an overachiever, I had happily and passionately leaped from one stone to the next to a joyful and successful life, according to society's standards. However, I have always questioned myself and others about everything, living in a world full of questions rather than answers.
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"Who am I? What should I do next? What's my reason for being? Am I happy? Am I doing enough?
Does what I'm doing matter? Why is this important?
Am I making the world a better place?"
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And my answer to every question has always been: I don't know, but I want to figure it out.
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Those questions got too loud when I experienced breakdowns; unexpected events that changed my reality. Breakdowns, or breaks in transparencies as we called them in the coaching realm, have the ability to shake our world and stir our wheels. Even though they represented opportunities to grow and reflect, I didn't always take the time and space to look inside and give them space to coexist.
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Whenever I experienced one in the past, I ended up trusting more the common path rather than my own instincts or intuition. Now, I know better.
Life is full of breakdowns
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I was just starting my career as a Digital Marketing Coordinator, after graduating as a Business Administrator at a top university in Colombia. I did many fascinating things before that, which made me a very interesting professional candidate for the market -as I was told.
I graduated as valedictorian from a very good ranked high school, studied a year abroad in the US, learned french for 6 months in France while I was in college and got a very prestigious internship at a very well-known international pharmaceutical. My GPA was very competitive and my appetite to move up the ladder in a company was very appealing to headhunters and companies.
It was my first full-time job at a tech startup and I felt unstoppable. I gave all my time and energy to developing a new digital strategy and as time went by, many other responsibilities were given to me. My drive to succeed seemed to be moving up each step of the corporate ladder. I started working late hours and focusing only on my career and success.
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It all worked out until I found myself crying in the shower every morning before going to work and every night before going to bed. I felt tired and with no motivation. I was burned out and I didn't like what I was doing anymore. Is this how life as a grown-up is supposed to be? I was not only doing the brand's marketing strategy at the time but also some other operational activities unrelated to my area -because you know, usually, at startups, you end up doing a lot. I had no time for myself or any of my passions. Work, work, work. There must be something better - I thought...And there was.
After many tears and deep conversations with my family, friends and boyfriend, who was also burned out working as a business consultant, -it's more common than you think, I decided it was time for a change and started looking for a new job. I have always dreamed about working at a beauty and cosmetic company so when I saw an opportunity at an awesome and well-known company, I applied and got the job. It was my dream come true and it was time for me to move on...
TIME AND SPACE to reconnect
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Similarly, as happened before, I threw myself into this new role determined to be the best. I was the Digital Marketing Specialist (DMI) for a national brand and a year later, became the DMI for the same brand in Latam. I was growing in the company and building a rockstar team. I was happy with my success and had silenced my inner questions again. I was living the dream!
Fast forward a few years and another job role, now located in Chile, I found myself overworked again. I was neglecting my well-being and quality time with my partner. I was sacrificing my life balance for the job and felt unfulfilled.
I started going to yoga classes every other night, leaving my workspace earlier than the rest of my colleagues because I needed time for myself. Even though I loved my team and some of the projects I was leading as a Product Manager, I wanted more -but that was just a conversation in my mind.
I experienced some interesting changes in my life and the workspace after immersing in regular yoga practice. It allowed me to develop more resilience and patience, to be more aware of my breathing, gain consciousness over my body, and start listening to my thoughts. I used those tools to become more mindful and make important decisions on a day-to-day basis.
I was reconnecting to myself and I realized as with yoga I was missing many life pleasures and experiences outside my cubicle. A fire was lit inside me.
As I started listening to myself and my needs, I drew some limits in the work environment and my personal life, becoming better at managing work-life balance and also my responsibilities. I was a better leader and strategist for the brand, I accomplished great results, and learned to use the word"no" more often. I also became a better listener and mentor for some people in my team.
I was happy, but I always questioned if there was something else beyond the reef and If I was meant for more... Questions were back, or have they never left?
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I didn't know the answer and Covid was around the corner. A lot of uncertainty and human sadness came which of course brought anxiety and a different work-life dynamic. With the pandemic, I realized that life was fragile and that for some it was very short. Are we living life to its fullest? Am I?
I HAD FOLLOWED THE COMMON PATH TO "SUCCESS" UNTIL THen
Around 2020, my husband and I were making an important decision for our future; whether to do a master's degree abroad or keep moving up the ladder at our current jobs. He really wanted to do an MBA and change his journey, more particularly, to create his own startup and I wanted a life turn.
I have studied a "safe and certain" professional career at a "good" college, lived abroad, worked for "prestigious" companies, and I had an "exciting important" marketing role. What was next? An MBA, for sure. That was the most rational and conventional answer, but my body and emotions disagreed. Every time I pictured myself doing an MBA, I felt a weird sensation in my stomach. Do I really want to do an MBA? Why? Whom do I want to impress? Is it aligned with what I want to do next? What do I want to do next? I don't know.
When the mind doesn't know the answer, your body does. That's how I knew I didn't want to do an MBA at that moment. Every time I sat to think about my options, the idea of doing it didn't feel right. Even though I used to think that was the smartest and safest road for me. Or was it something my culture taught me?
But I definitely wanted to take a break and have some time and space to think about what I really wanted to do with my life at that point. I wanted to make a fully conscious decision, putting myself first. I always had a feeling there was something more, something else, something different I was meant to be doing. So, I quit my job and my husband started his MBA.
In between those two decisions, my husband and I decided to get married in Colombia among our family and most important friends. We wanted to celebrate the decision of choosing each other as life partners and embracing a new adventure together again.
BECOMING A COACH​
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With time and space, I started to explore my passions. I did some ceramics, macrame, yoga, and lots of running. I was using that me-me time to have conversations with myself.
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Some deep soul searching and many cups of coffee and tea brought me to an open-hearted truth: the times when I was most happy and have felt whole, were not the times I was giving a marketing presentation, but the times when I was connecting to someone through a powerful and deep conversation.
I loved when people wanted to talk to me about their deepest feelings, their life experiences, or their issues seeking a friend that might help them see things in a lighter more positive way. Or when they just wanted someone to talk to and feel listened to. I was a confidant for many and what I enjoyed the most was mentoring people and helping them succeed or achieve their goals. That brought me a lot of joy!
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I was confident I could help other people in their journey using my intuition and my passion. I started to search for coaching certifications because I wanted to have the tools to help others and I was drawn to Ontological Coaching because it's about coaching who you are being. It doesn't coach the story, but the person and its essence.
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It's so powerful once we understand that the true transformation comes when we change the observer we are BEING, instead of only changing the actions we are creating towards certain results. As Einstein said," We cannot solve our problems with the same thinking we used when we created them".
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Once I found my perfect fit with the Coaching school, I started a new journey and finished my Ontological Certification at Newfield Network in the US. I have worked with many clients who have become happier, confident and have learned to live by choosing their own path and purpose-driven life. Every time I finish a coaching call, my heart and soul simply smile.
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Walking my journey from Chicago now, helping others connect to themselves, find their true sense of belonging and create and follow their own journey have become one of my life's purposes. Spending my time partnering with people to create the life of their dreams, where real fulfillment springs from heart and soul, give me joy and peace.
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We all have experienced breakdowns. Our life changes constantly. We either carried a shift, the loss of someone close, an important decision, and more. It's how you are being who determines how you experience a breakdown and how you experience change.
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If being in a relationship with someone like me sounds exciting, transformational, and joyous, let's talk.
STILLReading?
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A few more things about myself that you might find interesting...